Back To It

Today was the big day.  Up at 6.18 this morning, after not falling asleep until almost midnight.  Kids up at 7, which went over about as well as you'd expect.  Oddly enough (note the sarcasm here) it only took Tuesday 30 of her 60 minutes before school to pick out her outfit for the day. 

It was great to walk her to school.  I had to go this morning because we had the whole Last Name thing to deal with.  Not only did the letter home regarding 5th grade refer to her as Tuesday Todaro, it referred to John and myself as Mr. and Mrs. Todaro.  How funny is that?!?  Um, Mr. and Mrs. Todaro are my parents!!  So I needed to go to the office and correct her name.  I gave her the option--I could let her teacher know about her name or she could.  5th grade now, you know.  I don't want to make her look uncool in front of her friends.  It was a treat that she wanted me to explain it to her teacher.

So at 8am we headed out the door.  She was sporting a brand new backpack which matches her birthday lunchbox from Amie (thanks again, Amie!).  The backpack had to weigh 25 pounds, I swear!  It was ridiculous.  Full of all the supplies they request you have for your first day of school.  We walked to school with some friends of ours, Tuesday taking my hand a couple times during our six block walk.  We dropped the girls off with their respective new 5th grade teachers.  Tuesday's teacher seemed great.  Friendly, classy enough to demand respect.  I explained the name change in the briefest of ways.  "She was enrolled as Tuesday Todaro last year but this year she's Tuesday McKee."  The teacher looked at Tuesday and said "You'll have to correct me today but tomorrow I'll remember it."  Students and parents were backing up in the hallway behind us at the bottleneck of a doorway.  I looked down at her and said "Have a great first day, babe" and to my delight, she looked up and puckered her lips for a kiss.  I obliged, pinching her cheeks in my hand to pucker her up further before heading down the hall, delighting in that kiss.  A quick check in at the office, the exchange of paperwork, the smile from the woman, knowing how hard won that little change was.  A quick tour through the sign up sheets in the gym.  Flouride Lady and Library Helper for me, and then the walk home.

Its a big difference, this year from last year.  I didn't know much on the first day last year.  I had figured out what clothes to send her in, what shoes she should wear.  I knew about how much food she would eat in half an hour, between all the talking with her friends.  I knew what time to send her and when to expect her home if she were walking.

I didn't know that it was okay for me to dote on her that day.  I didn't know that I should go in with her that day.  I didn't know the questions to ask after the first day.  I didn't know that it would be cool with her if I volunteered at the school.

It all winds up at the same place.  Its totally okay for me to be interested, to care and to express that caring.  Not only is it okay, but it makes her happy, which in turn makes me happy, which in turn makes her happy.  Its a really great cycle.

I had wanted to take her school shopping before school started.  For about a dozen reasons, we simply ran out of time for it.  When I approached her the other night about going, I told her we could make a day of it, in a couple of weeks.  Take the whole day, go out for lunch together, the works.  She sucked in her breath, raised her eyebrows and flapped her hands, exclaiming, "I could use my 'Shop Till You Drop' coupon!!!"  Glee.  Delight. 

I don't know why I would assume that she WOULDN'T be so excited to spend that time with me.  I'm glad I'm pushing it a bit.  By 7th grade, 8th at the outside, I'm sure I'll be totally uncool and the idea of hanging out with me, let alone kissing me in school, will be simply unfathomable. 

Or perhaps it won't be.  Perhaps we will be friends.  Perhaps I'll be that seemingly rare mom who can talk about boys, periods, choices, situations, all without making her uncomfortable.  Perhaps I'll be so cool I'll even have her friends confidence.  I'll find out with time, I'm sure.  Aim high, work for it, and understand that as long as I'm Doing My Best for her, I can't be too hard on myself.  

Either way, I'm going to soak up every bit of the love and sweetness I can get.  Love, when it comes down to it, is a pretty freakin' amazing thing.

So when she came home, having had a great day, I was thrilled.  I've missed so much time with her.  Not that I can undo that, or make up for it, but I can try to catch up, remembering all the while, every bit of it is a big freaking gift.  Remembering not to take any of it for granted.

On The Eve

Tonight we're wrapping up a wonderful two week visit from our friends Bill & Linda and their kids. They're friends from "back east". Out here, that can mean anything as far west as Fargo, apparently.  These friends happen to be from the Far East--Connecticut.

And as their visit winds down, so too does our summer. Tomorrow Tuesday goes back to school.

We as a family are learning about back to school. There's the sigh of relief--the hectic summer is finally over and we can catch our breath and go back into our routines. Time to start thinking about fall, fall clothes, indoor activities, making sure we've got enough firewood, crockpot meals... At the same time, its the end of a wonderful summer together--this one more so than ever before.

And as I said, we're learning about all of this. This is, after all, only our second Back To School year.

So goodbye getting up at 8am. Goodbye Tuesday reading until 10am. Goodbye long, lazy camping weekends. Goodbye no dress code, weeks without daycare, forgetting what day of the week it is...

And hello school clothes, packed lunches, love notes from me in school books, homework, after school activities, waiting until 3pm to go out for the weekend.

And so we recognize another step in the cycle. One step closer to high school, to prom, to her heading to college, one step closer to Coop in kindergarten, driving lessons, dating...

So here I sit, very contented with where we are right now. Its easier than it has been and I'm sure it'll get harder at some point. For now, another milestone, another thing we share as a family.

Here's hoping you're feeling good tonight, too.